08 Feb What changes should I expect? Does anything stay the same?
The changes you can expect will depend on how old you are when your parents divorce. If you are very young when it happens, you might not be aware of the changes. However, if you are older when your parents decide to divorce, you may experience a host of changes. At any age, these changes may include:
You may move to a new house, town, city
You may see one of your parents less often
You may hear arguments that make you sad
You may be asked to take more responsibility around the house and/or with siblings
You may feel pressure to spend less money
You may need to take the bus when earlier a parent drove you
You may see less of the parent you live with because that parent may need to work more
You may see less of your friends when you are visiting a parent who is far away
You may feel isolated or scared or lonely or…
You may make some incredible new friends
You will learn who your true friends are
You may see changes in both your parents as they adapt to their new lives
As one teen told us, “The amount of new stuff was terrible. First, I had to pack a bag every other day to go be with my dad. Not that I didn’t want to see him, but this whole packing-a-bag-thing gets old fast. Then my mom had to move because she couldn’t afford her house anymore. That stunk. Then everything seemed complicated because they couldn’t even have a conversation with each other without fighting.”
Some parents work really hard to keep things as normal as possible. This isn’t easy but it’s great for the kids. Some parents get along really well during and after the divorce. Good for them! If only more parents could find that balance. Unfortunately, a lot of emotions surround divorce and emotions (do we need to even tell you this) can get really out of control when not managed well. (Parents need help managing emotions too!)
The one thing that does not change: the love that your parents have for you, even though with all the changes you may not feel it at times. We understand that divorce can make you feel alone and… well, how do you feel?
If your parents got divorced, what was the best change that took place? The worst?