24 Feb Get ready: the moment of truth
Here it is: the moment you have been waiting for. The moment you have been fantasizing about for weeks on end, and now, it’s actually happening! And… well… you think you are going to vomit.
Nerves. They can be so awful and so embarrassing. Not only have you gone as mute and mumbly as Frankenstein, you also have started to sweat so much that your armpits look like two black holes big enough to contain separate universes. Ugh! Is there anything you can do?
Well, of course, there is.
What? You want to know details? The how? Really?
Well, OK, just for you.
Because actually, the first thing you can do is to focus on you. If you are getting really nervous around someone, chances are you are saying things in your head like:
- “OMG, he’s so cute! He couldn’t possibly like me!” or
- “She’s so hot. I just could never think of the right words to say to her.” or
- “I’m such a dork, who would ever like me?” or
- “He/she is amazing. Why should I be so lucky?”
You should be so lucky because you are totally wonderful, awesome, unique and spectacular just because you are you. Stop selling yourself short. Start selling yourself wonderful.
Your first get “ready task” is to take inventory of yourself – a positive inventory. Think of at least three qualities that you like about yourself. Now think about meeting someone with those particular qualities. Would you be pleased to meet someone like that? Would it be an awful experience? Chances are you’d be really happy (or just plain fine) meeting someone with those qualities. So stop thinking that the person you like wouldn’t feel good meeting someone like that – like you.
The next time you run into your crush, think positively about yourself and focus on the great things you have to offer.
Your second “get ready” task is to prepare. Just like any performance you have in school or sports, the more you prepare, the better your chances of success. So, prepare for your next run-in with your crush. Think about what you could possibly say to him/her.
All people get nervous when they truly want to perform well. You are not alone. The secret to handling those nerves is preparation. Many people can’t find the right words to say in the moment because their nervous ENERGY takes over and blocks all intelligent thought from entering their heads so: PREPARE.
Think of some questions you could ask:
- Do you have the math homework?
- Nice shoes. Where did you get them? I’d like to get a pair for my brother.
- Hey, did you see the game last night? I didn’t get to see it and I am dying to know what happened.
- Where are you headed next?
And don’t beat yourself up if what you say to your crush isn’t as smooth as vanilla ice cream. Just be proud of yourself for saying something, and then think, “That was so bad, there’s nowhere to go but up!”
Have you ever had an embarrassing moment with a crush? Care to share?