What exactly is a crush? How does it differ from love? How can you tell the difference?

A crush is an intense feeling of liking someone and hoping, praying, wishing that they like you back, more than just the “yeah, she’s cool, she’s my neighbor” type of like.

Crushes express that you think someone stands out from the crowd; that you experience feelings of excitement when you are around them.

Crushes feel good and most everyone has a crush on someone at some point in time or another. Some are big, some are small, some seem earth shattering—you can’t even get your algebra homework done without drifting off into la-la-crush land.

These earth shattering, all encompassing crushes, are often the ones that can get confused with love. The intense feelings of a crush are so big and so powerful, it seems cruel just to call your feelings a crush. The enormity of the feelings make you think that you might be in LOVE.

Love is a more permanent and deeper feeling. Deeper? How can anything feel deeper than what you are feeling right now? I mean, come on! Your whole world is spinning on the axis of this person. How much deeper can you get? (Not to mention, that your body may be feeling things in deeper places than you ever knew existed.)

But, you need to think of love as, well, an aged mature expensive cheese. What?  Stinky cheese? Yes. Just wait a moment – and remember, it’s only an ANALOGY.

Anyone can go into a store and buy cheddar cheese – it doesn’t take that long to make.  Just like a crush, crushes don’t take that long to develop either, and yet they do taste good. But, really fine, flavorful and rich cheese takes lots of time to develop. This type of cheese is left to ripen for long periods of time. And so too must love – it ripens over a longer period of time and its flavor is richer and more complex than a crush.

Hate cheese? Don’t get the analogy? You’re probably not alone. Here’s another thought:

The difference between a crush and love can also be measured in how truly comfortable you are around the other person. With a crush, even though you have intense feelings for this person, you might still feel unsure about yourself in front of them and try always to be your “best” with them.  Within a relationship that has ripened to love, you feel incredibly SECURE around the other person and can just be yourself around that person, even if it’s not so pretty at times.

At this point, the big thing to remember is this: A crush is fun! It feels good! Enjoy it!  But don’t rush it. You’re in your teen years; you have lots of time for aged stinky cheese later. For now enjoy the moment and be thankful that you have something great that you can daydream about during history class.