13 Sep Bonus YSS: Stories to the rescue
Below are a few stories (of the real kind) that readers and YSS family have shared. If you are being bullied, perhaps they will help you to feel comforted that you are not alone in what is happening to you and to perhaps help you uncover a way to handle your own situation. If you have a story to share that you think might help others, please email it to us!
Story #347: Have some comebacks ready.
When Chris was in third grade she sat down next to one of her friends in school. That friend turned to her “sniffed” and said, “Ew, you smell” and then got up and left. Every one of her “friends” that she sat down next to that day proceeded (meaning went ahead) to do the same thing. When Chris got home, she started pulling off her clothes as soon as she got into the house to take a shower. Her mom said, “What are you doing?” and Chris explained to her mom what had happened and that she needed to take a shower right away. Her mother told Chris that she didn’t smell at all and that those girls were just being mean. She told Chris that if it happened again the next day to say, “Dogs smell their own poo first so it must be you.” Sure enough, the next day, the same thing happened. But this time Chris said exactly what her mother had told her to say. It stopped the first two girls from getting up and leaving, and then finally one of the girls said, “I was just kidding. Laura told us to say that to you.” Laura was the leader of the friend group who had a mean streak. The other girls apologized for going along and the situation ended. Sort of. Chris admits that she never ever felt the same way about Laura again and kept her distance from her. Chris still remembers how painful that experience was for her.
Story #682: Tell someone.
Ever feel like you need to save face – that standing up to the bully is the only option even though you know you might get your face smashed in? A social worker in a very tough area had a student confide in her that there would be a fight after school that day – two girls wanted to beat up this one girl. And the one girl, let’s call her Tara, felt like she had to show up or else things would get worse for her socially. By NOT showing up, Tara felt like the other girls would gain the upper hand (the power) and that she would look weak in front to the whole school. Tara felt she had to show her strength.
But the social worker knew the outcome: Tara was going to get badly beaten if she showed up. And although the social worker had to keep confidence, the social worker decided to wedge herself into the situation without anyone knowing she knew about the fight. So, after school the social worker decided to take a stroll and “just happened” to walk into a crowd of female students who looked pretty angry and ready to fight. The social worker walked up to the more aggressive of the girls present and started a conversation about something that she knew interested them. The conversation lasted for a while and, after some time, the social worker ended up walking the girls toward their subway station. No fight took place that day. What’s the moral of the story? Tell someone. Especially if you feel threatened. You may have to save face and all that stuff, but tell someone. You never know how it may help, but it’s more likely to help if you tell, than if your don’t.