Think about what is important to you.  

Are looks the most important thing on your list of finding a friend?  

Then why put it on the top of the list for finding yourself 

(or for what you think will help you find yourself)?

Is there ONE great way to look?  

Or, do you enjoy the fact that people look different from each other?  

What is important to you? 

Think about the people in your life that you admire.  

What do you admire about them?  

Their spirit? Their sense of humor? Their thoughtfulness? Their ankles?

Take some time to write down the things that you do like about yourself:  

Write down five physical traits that you like.

Write down five things that your body allows you to do, i.e., my muscular thighs allow me to slam a soccer ball into the goal; my big eyes allow me to see all the beautiful things about me!

Now think about the things that you don’t like.

Can you change them? For instance, you might think, “I’m not tall enough.” But your height is one thing outside your control… you can’t exercise or eat your way into being taller. So recognize the things that you can’t change and spend some time thinking over whether your time is well spent getting upset over that.

Try to think in terms of “health” as opposed to “fattening or bad.”  “Is this food healthy for me?” instead of “Will it make me fat?”  For instance, “Will doing this make me feel better or worse? Did I treat my body well today? Did I give it the nutrients it needs?” or, “Did I worry about what I was eating because I thought it might make me look bad?”  

Most important, whenever a negative thought pops into your head, replace it with a positive one:  

• “Ugh, I hate my thighs…. but they do make me run fast.”  
• “Oh I wish I was pretty like her… but I do have my own look.”  
• “I wish my nose was smaller… but then again, Jenna is my best friend and she has a bigger nose than I do and I like the way she looks!”  

Over time, we hope that you can banish those negative thoughts all together. Instead of, “Ugh I hate my thighs,” you might one day find yourself thinking, “I love my thighs, they are part of me.”

Be aware of the messages you are being sent everyday through not only the media, but also your friends and family. Think about if what they are saying really fits in with your beliefs. Do you have to have big boobs to have a great bod? Is a little junk in the trunk something you like or don’t like or do you not even care  When you hear a friend say, “Wow, she really needs to do something about that hair,” ask your friend, “Why.?” Is that girl unhealthy or is your friend just thinking about the way that girl looks? Maybe even think about speaking up, “You know, I think she looks great. She’s happy with who she is, so why does she need to change the way she looks?”  

Talk to your friends about how you are feeling. We bet a lot of them share similar thoughts about their bodies and looks that you do. Support each other. Think about ways you can help each other feel good about yourselves. Make a pact to say one positive thing about each other every day and to speak up when you hear people being negative.