For Parents

An Overview

Hello! We are Chris and Paula, founders of Your Self Series (YSS). While you are clearly concerned and involved in your child’s education, health and well-being, we, too, have a vested interest in helping our future generations – it’s the whole reason we developed Your Self Series.  We believe all children deserve a chance to grow up to be happy, healthy, purposeful and passionate individuals who feel comfortable being WHO THEY ARE.

To that end, we spent years designing this program. We worked closely with teens, conducted surveys and listened as they told us what would help them explore their passions and reach their goals.  The result is the YSS program: created with, and dedicated to, teens.

In the following boxes, we aim to answer as many questions as possible that you may have about Your Self Series, everything from its purpose and structure, to how you can support your own child in the process.

If we failed to answer one of your questions, please do not hesitate to contact us via email.  (Yes, seriously, you can contact us!)

Thank you for visiting the site.

Our best,

Paula & Chris

Click on a question to learn more.

My daughter loves your program. She saves health homework for last because she looks forward to it.

- spontaneous feedback from a 6th grade parent

What is YSS?

Your Self Series is a program – consisting of three interactive books and this website – that focuses primarily on the development of the self.   YSS is typically taught during the middle school years but can begin as early as fifth grade and can extend into high school depending on the needs of the population. It is most often taught as a health, advisory or an after school program.

Your Self Series empowers young teens with the correct information and encouragement to deal with tough issues, find their inner self and feel more confident in life. How? By helping them develop their identities through a solid sense of self.

A solid sense of self is what enables a person to answer the questions, “Who am I?” and “Where do I want to go in life?” with clarity and confidence.  It is the critical component necessary for sound decision-making, a sense of purpose and life-long happiness. YSS is the only series that provides this self focus – again, a critical component of the teen years and yet one seldom addressed in schools.

Our society talks about happiness and success for our children. But happiness is not the outcome of success. Success is the outcome of happiness. A true inner feeling of worth and belonging is the foundation for motivation, resilience and passion.

What do the books teach?

All together, the books to lay the foundation for the self. The first book, Discover Your Self, covers all the internal factors that create your sense of self (your brain, body, thoughts, feelings, morals, and the mind body connection). The second book, Manage Your Self, covers all the external factors that impact the self (friends, family, media, culture, school and experiences). The third and final book, Express Your Self, covers the cyclical interaction of the self with the world, emphasizing that what you “put out there” will, in turn, produce a related experience (topics explored are communication, personality, relationships, work, artistic expression and decision-making).

The hallmark of the Series is the self-reflective questions that do not ask teens to regurgitate the information, but rather to contemplate it and apply it to themselves: What would you do in this situation? What do you think of this information? How does it make you feel? How is it useful to you? In this way the material becomes personally meaningful to them. When material gains personal meaning, it supports motivation and retention. (Note: Students write directly in the books – making the books a personal journey and journal they can keep and even return to if desired.)

What does the website offer?

The website is used to supplement the material discussed in class and provides in depth information on a wide variety of topics.  Teachers may assign certain web “posts” depending on the issues mandated by the State and on the setting and topics the teacher feels is needed for each individual class.  For instance, “nutrition” may be mandated by the State for health classes, while exploring the key components of  healthy relationships may be appropriate at other times.  In this manner, YSS is able to meet the needs of different settings and individuals. Your children are unique!  We believe they benefit from a program that can address their unique needs.

As such, the website has a wide variety of different topics. Many topics are mandated by schools to teach, such as reproduction, nutrition and smoking.  Many are topics teachers have asked us to provide, such as resilience, decision-making and food allergies. Other topics students have expressed a desire to learn, such as secrets, crushes and back-to-school advice.  Overall, the website provides a safe place (with absolutely no outside advertising anywhere on the site) for teens to learn about who they are in relation to a host of relevant and timely concerns. With every topic, teens are encouraged to post their opinions and participate in various activities.

Please take some time to visit the teen side of the site (link at the bottom of this webpage) to familiarize yourself with the types of topics we cover and the tone we use.  Under each of the six main topic headings, you will find individual topics listed. Click on one-  the content will be on the left side of the page, the additional “posts” in that topic listed in the top right corner. Explore!

How will YSS benefit my child?

Academics alone do not dictate a fruitful and successful life. Knowing how to navigate life’s social, emotional and moral challenges and opportunities is equally if not more important for the welfare of our children. Being able to navigate life with strength, clarity and confidence is dependent on self skills – the skills on which YSS is based. For instance:

  • When students have social skills they are more likely to successfully navigate peer pressure.
  • When students identify with prevention programs, they are less likely to do drugs.
  • When students develop empathy, they are less likely to bully and more likely to help a friend who is bullied.
  • When students understand mental health, they are more likely to make good decisions about their own.
  • When students become self-aware they are better able to manage their emotions.
  • When students learn about and develop resilience skills, their creativity flourishes.
  • When students discover strategies for communication and collaboration, they feel more successful in future jobs and relationships.
  • When middle and high school students develop these skills through a program such as YSS, life stressors are reduced and academic learning flourishes
  • (http://casel.org/why-it-matters/benefits-of-sel/metaanalysis/). 

Ultimately,YSS aims to build wisdom: to use knowledge in the service of others. Wisdom brings together intellectual and emotional intelligence to guide decisions while recognizing our common humanity. By building a strong sense of self, your children have the foundation needed for a happy, purposeful and successful life led with wisdom.

How is the program structured and taught?

In the classroom, the program is student-driven, teacher-facilitated. At first, students experience ice-breakers and then set classroom rules and consequences – taking ownership of their learning. Likewise they also decide who covers individual chapter content for the “group discussion” days. On group discussion days, students lead a conversation about a topic of their choosing related to the chapter content. The group discussions prompt self-reflection and communication skills, as well as teamwork, empathy and self-confidence. During discussions, the room will typically be set up in a circle format so that students can make eye contact with each other and feel included (no more hiding in the back row). Student opinion is never demanded. It is always optional. But respect for fellow students is required at all times to build trust, compassion and collaboration.

On “teacher clarification” days, teachers review chapter content and answer any questions while validating all that was accomplished during the previous group discussion. On other days, teachers may choose to utilize the website or work on group projects related to the material. YSS is structured so that teachers can be flexible and students can help drive their learning experience.

Most often, the books are taught one book per year over the course of  three consecutive years, although some settings teach all three books in a year. “Research has consistently shown that programs that emphasize a one-time presentation focused on raising awareness rarely produce behavioral change.” (www.mentoring.org) This is why YSS continually reinforces self-awareness, emotion regulation, and self-skills over a more prolonged period (a year to three years). Long lasting impressions are not made in a one-time lecture so often found in schools to meet a state mandate. The self is enlightened and affected through consistent, supportive and reliable interactions with relevant information and fellow classmates. This process is what makes YSS so successful.

What is to be expected of my child?

Similar to other classes, what your child puts into this program will determine what he will get out of it. Only your child can discover who she is – it’s an individual process. And it takes time. Some students soak up the content and spend personal time perusing the website. Otherstudents merely do what is asked in the assignments. However  they choose to delve into the program will be reflected in the amount of personal awareness and understanding they achieve.

Of note, the journal is a personal piece of work that your child may choose to keep private. Teachers will not be reading the information entered. At most, teachers will ask students to flip through the book quickly to show the teacher that the work is done (not for teachers to read it). If at any time your child feels uncomfortable answering a question, he can simply write, “I feel uncomfortable answering this.” The content of what is written is for your child’s eyes only. It should only be shared with anyone (including you) when your child wants to do so.

If your child is taking YSS as part of a health or advisory class, she may have a greater amount of reading to do than with more traditional health and advisory classes. However, the reading is not heavy when compared to a traditional textbook – it is conversational in tone. Moreover, no matter what your child decides to do in life, his health – both physical and mental – is a critical component to that success. We may not all use algebra on a daily basis or write poetry, but we all benefit from health information every day for the rest of our lives.

How can I support my child in the YSS program?

YSS is a process of self-discovery and likely one of the few opportunities middle and high school students have to consolidate their identities during this delicate stage of development. To make the most of this process, your children will need to answer the questions in their own words from their own thoughts and feelings. The more you tell them what you think and feel BEFORE they have thought about a question, the less likely they are to formulate their own unique opinion and overall identity.

However, please take the opportunity to have robust conversations if your children so desire! The “seek first” method often proves to garner the best responses: ask them to describe the material, what they learned, what they found interesting, what they think, what they feel and with what they agree/disagree. As the conversation develops, your own thoughts and feelings will inevitably enter the picture but hopefully as more a reflection to their own opinions than of yours. This method is more likely to keep the conversation flowing, increase their awareness and clarify their beliefs.

Fair warning: You may disagree with what your child has to say and, as a parent, by all means you have the right to express your disagreement, but try to remember that the manner in which you express your disagreement will either foster a relationship of trust and exploration versus one of shame and embarrassment. For instance, saying, “That’s ridiculous!” will provide a much different experience for your child than saying “Wow, I hear your point but have you thought about…?” Or, “What do you think of…?” The degree to which you are open to your children exploring their sense of self, including some ideologies that may differ from yours, will determine how willing and able they are to be themselves.

Closing Remarks

Your school has chosen YSS because it cares about your children: academically, socially and emotionally. With all the programs they could choose, they have chosen one that endeavors to give your child confidence, courage and compassion. Although YSS may cover some material that is not traditionally in the school “realm,” it is material necessary for them to succeed in the 21st century and, most important, for them to find happiness along the way.

Please know that our passions lie fully in their feelings of success. We have watched our own children navigate this time ourselves and know how both inspiring and challenging middle and high school can be. We appreciate that you are reading this because your desires align with ours: to support your children in being the best that they can be. To that end, if you would like to explore the books in more detail, click here.

If you would like to read about the research on YSS, please click here. If you want to learn more about social emotional learning and why it’s needed now more than ever, click here. And, of course, if you have a specific question that we have not addressed here, please feel to email us at chris@yourSelfSeries.com or paula@YourSelfSeries.com

We hope you and your children enjoy and grow from the YSS experience. We wish them all the best in discovering and being who they truly are.

Sincerely,

Chris and Paula